Moustached Friends Profiled

Who are my friends? Do you care?

	Gareth Radford: The Welsh wonder kid, known as G5 to his mates. In his spare time G5 likes to do dinosaur impressions in pubs. Investgations have concluded that the most realistic impressions are done after several pints and are best performed on top of pub tables. Gareths favourite games include football, rugby, cricket and 'cock or ball?'. The cheeky Mr Radford can regularly be found in the Wine Vaults where he does the pub quiz on Sunday nights, getting so drunk that by the end of the evening he's unable to read the answers from the page. Mr Radford is the proud owner of a love leek which impresses all the ladies, or so I'm told.
	Norm: A man with a fine moustache who is currently preaching the gospel in America, Land of the Free. Since moving to America Norman has started to WHOOOP uncontrolably and lost any interest in things which arn't sponsered by Coca-Cola or Bud. Norman hates American people who think he's Irish.
	Pix: In an attempt to prove once and for all that he's 'not stupid', Pix is studying for a Phd in something or other at Cardiff. Pixes main interests include complaining about his life and impregnating annoying hamsters. Pix has been cultivating his facial hair since he was 12 and has produced some magnificent specimens in the past. This culminated in the growing of a magnificent beard strap which, although not a 'tache, deserves respect. I recommed visiting monkey_world, his very own jobby infested s(h)ite.
	John: Mr Grant enjoys painting pictures and fiddling with himself. Mr Grant once drove though the center of Glasgow on a Saturday afternoon with a stolen stags head on the roof of his car whilst simultaneously playing "born free" at full volume on his car sterio. Back in '93 John won the best student brewer of the year award with his 'Blue Thunder' drink which contained home brewed beer and cider, along with a secret mix of spirits and copious amounts of blue food colouring. All year our lectureres were asking why whole classes had blue mouths and kept passing out. Blue Thunder, a drink Homer Simpson would appreciate
	Allan: Allans main ability involves tricking Big B into thinking that he's intercepting text messages from his girlfriend. The fool Big B never seems to realise that he accidently sent them to Allan two days earlier. When not earning ten squillion pounds an hour, Allan enjoys watching football being played the way it was meant to be played. He also enjoys watching Kilmarnock FC.
	Big B: A stand up bloke who's comedy antics are legendary and usually unintentional. Currently lives the life of a hermit in some clock tower on Great Western Rd. His main hobby is getting girlfriends and hiding them from his friends, word on the street is that he locks them up in the tower before going to the pub. David loves it when a plan comes together.
	Craig: A man of few words who's ability to get drunk exceeds even that of Sandy. Instead of falling over Craig often falls into a comba like state usually leaving his friends for dead outside his flat. As a keen Rangers supporter, Craigs ambition is to one day wed Lorenzo Amouroso.
	Sando: To Sandy, life doesn't get much better than drinking then falling over. Sando can often be seen in the streets of London where he climbs up things to impress the ladies. As officially the most generous man alive he often buys whole pubs full of strangers beer. Remember kids, don't talk to strangers, Sando's a professional and knows exactly what he's doing.
	Robert: When asked by Australian customs if he had a criminal record, Robert replied, "No, why? do you still need one?". When not getting full anal searches Robert enjoys wandering around SE Asia and Australia taking pictures of erect monkey peni. He's even got some web site but you're not allowed to leave any even remotly dodgy comments on it as Christina's parents are nun's, or something.
	Monica: Monica's surname, Calzada Castanio, translates directly into 'Beautiful Angel walking amongst Chestnut trees with a large bag of potatoes" Her hobbies include making me eat random spanish dishes usually made of sausage or dried blood. My hobbies include regurgitating spanish food, usually made of sausage or dried blood. Monica and I take part in some sort of beautiful culture exchange: she teaches me new languages, shows me new places, interesting films and tasty food. I bring beer and football to the mix. As I'm sure you'll agree, we make a beautiful team.
	Silvia: Miss Rodriguez Rodriguez favourite hobby is laughing uncontrolably, usually for no reason whatsoever. Although you may think that there is some sort of echo on the page, I should explain how Spanish surnames are formed: They consist of two names one from the fathers side of the family and the other is taken from the name of the mothers first dog. Silvia can often be found wandering the streets of Edinburgh with her friend Gemma Garcia Rover, a trip she used to make on donkey but no longer as it died recently.
	Mum: The lady that made this whole site possible and started the 'tache craze by drawing a pen moustache on me only seconds after I was born.